I'd love to sit down, cup of tea in hand, with each and every one of you to talk about something huge. Something that every young mom experiences. Something that storms in uninvited, throws your world off balance, and leaves a mess in its wake. Since I can't do that, I'll happily chat with you here in this safe zone; it's the next best thing.
So let's do it. Let's talk about fear.
I'll start, because I have a long and arduous history with it. Fear has shown up in my life in many ways. In worry for my kids health and safety, in keeping my opinions to myself so I could please others, in feeling like people don't take me seriously because I don't have the accolades, and in playing small when it comes to my dreams. These examples represent the grand spectrum of fear. And that's why it's such a tricky thing.
Many people perceive fear as something we're afraid of — something outside of ourselves. But this couldn't be further from the truth. The worst, most debilitating fear is what is inside of us. The odds of our worst external fear coming true are slim, but what we truly fear - our voices being heard, stepping into our greatness, dealing with past trauma — well, we live these everyday. And often times the birth of our babies is what brings these fears to the surface.
When we become moms, it's like we have a new set of wings.
We feel the call to greatness. We want to be better people. We want the world to be perfect for our children. But everything happens in stages, and the first stage for us new moms is dealing with fear and all its personalities. We couldn't possibly heal the external world if we haven't healed ourselves.
Today I wanted to share three tips to help you take control of your fears:
1. Call it out.
Calling out your fear by name is the single most important takeaway here. Fear only has power because it's lying under the surface. Once we name it, it loses its power. So when you feel the flight or fight kick in, know that it's just fear talking, and get it out in the open.
2. Start a dialogue.
Find yourself a personal growth buddy and support each other as you work through your fears. Maybe you're in a different stage then others in your life and can't find one — that's okay, join our bookclub, chat with us there. But take my word for it, someone will show up when you're ready.
3. Get inspired.
Everyone is inspired in different ways. For some, it's quotes. Others, a good book. Think about what inspires you and turn to it regularly to help keep you on track.
Tells us early moms, do you struggle with fear?